Letter to Lucia: 44 Months

Dear Little One,

I’m amazed at how much different you are now that you’re getting so close to four. A real turning point came just after three and a half, and though we’ve had a rough week here and there (and believe me—when they’re rough, they’re really rough), for the most part, it’s a sea change from where we were just six months ago.

You’ve always had an enormous personality, but it’s becoming even more entertaining now. You sing and make up songs; you dance; you close your eyes dramatically when you dance; you say things like “There’s only one problem. I have to get my water.” You pick out your own clothes each day, almost always a dress, and accessorize with headbands and jewelry. And you are showing pronounced strains of me: I recently put up my shelf of small things, very small things, and sometimes you look at it and say, “Mama, I love your tiny treasures!” We’ve put two large sections of our new card catalogs in our bedroom until we get the rest of the pieces here, and when you spotted them, you gasped and asked if you could have one for your room too. You may look like your daddy, but my influence is clear.

Preschool is over for the summer, and you seem to miss it. It was such a wonderful experience for you this year, and I hate to have these months without it, especially since I still take two mornings a week for myself. Without preschool, you stay with Greta and the babysitter, which—since this scenario just started—is hard for you. I’m hoping you will adjust. Greta always cries when I leave (stopping immediately once I’m gone), and there’s nothing worse than leaving two crying kids.

Your attention span has always been long, and that has continued. You love playing doctor more than anything else—well, doctor and store. Both activities can go on for a looooong time. A loooong time. You also love stringing beads. And, of course, now that it’s summer, you love playing outside, doing all manner of things in the yard. Collecting leaves, seeds, flowers, etc. is still among your standard activities.

You and Greta are playing together splendidly these days—when you’re not squabbling over toys. Even though I’ve been pretty strident about getting two of everything, it doesn’t matter. You want both, or you want the one Greta has, or you constantly want to “trade,” and sometimes this takes over any actual playing—which is frustrating for everyone, to say the least. Greta is old enough now that she doesn’t just give in or back down. But most of the time, you play and dance together and laugh. You like to teach Greta how to do things. And you like to do things together, and sit near her. You two exchange spontaneous hugs and kisses regularly, always lovely to see.

Favorite toys/activities: playing doctor, dancing, singing, watching Doc McStuffins, playing with tiny Barbie things (shoes etc.), Sit N Spin, hula hoops, stringing beads, making setups, drawing happy faces (often with hair and glasses) as well as happy-face suns

Favorite books: the Good Knight books by Shelley Moore Thomas, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty