Last night I made us a hideous dinner. Every fall Trader Joe’s puts out a “pumpkin butter,” and, in a flier, provides instructions for making an easy pumpkin cream sauce. How delicious, I thought—a rich pumpkin sauce over tortellini.
This was not the case. Imagine going into a Dollar Store and selecting a pumpkin-scented candle—the kind of cheap candle whose scent results in an instant headache. Now imagine melting that candle down, pouring it over pasta, and eating it. I’m not exaggerating when I say I got an instant headache—that horrible, chemical sweetness seemed to claw at my eyes and head from the inside. I shudder even now. Awful, awful, awful.